009 | “The Big Five” Areas of Conflict


Episode 009: “The Big Five” Areas of Conflict

Please remember our disclaimer: Everything we say on the podcast and all content on our web sites or social media is intended as general information only. Consuming our content does not constitute a client relationship. The general information we share is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis or treatment.

iTunes listeners: Don’t forget to SUBSCRIBE, RATE & REVIEW. As a reminder, here’s a quick video on how and why to do that. BECAUSE! When you leave a review, and email me that you did it, I will send you a free 30-day ebook with one healthy habit to incorporate each day. It’s a roadmap to boundless energy and a new level of wellness. I hope you’ll leave a review (and email me!) so you can snag it.

Quick reminder of the dream team that makes all this happen:

If you listened to previous episodes, you’ll recall that we “theme” our discussions by calendar month. And for the month of June, we’re talking about Relationships – specifically, marriages or romantic relationships that might be headed there. But a lot of what we talk about this month is applicable to other family and friend relationships as well. (Catch up with Episode 007 and Episode 008, if you haven’t already).

Announcements: Reminder to join our podcast Facebook group, if you haven’t already, and to use that group to post any comments, questions or reactions once you’ve listened to each week’s episode. We try to go live in there every now and then when we are together!

Updates: We’re coming live to you, from our giant family vacay at the beach!

Here’s what we discuss in Episode 009 – “The Big Five” Areas of Conflict:

In Haley’s practice, couples often come to her saying they are having trouble communicating with each other — but specifically, it’s communication within one or a few of these top five areas.

If there is not conflict in one or more of these areas, it could be because we just don’t talk about them.

Disclaimer before we talk about the #1 area of conflict of Sex: This discussion centers on healthy, consensual sex. If your current situation does not feel healthy for you (or if there is trauma or abuse in your past), please seek professional help.

The Big Five are:

  1. Sex — questions like ‘how often’ should be discussed openly about what feels comfortable based on your current season of life, instead of making assumptions and creating false narratives in our heads. (Re-listen to Episode 008 if you want to revisit how to communicate expectations)
    • Listen around minute-14 for Haley’s suggestion to try 365 days of “something sexy.”
  2. Finances — ‘should we have joint or separate accounts?’ … is one person a spender and the other a saver … are both parties spending too much … is there a lack of joy or adventure because neither partner is much of a spender?
    • Listen around minute-16 for Haley’s suggestion to look at the details in black and white: How much debt is there? What are the actual expenses and spending patterns?
  3. Children — Talk about discipline, how you want to parent; try to never undermine each other in front of the kids. Talk about how many kids to have, when to have them, personal position statements on things like spanking or education/schooling. (B of the D!)
  4. In-Laws — When there is disagreement with the other partner’s family, “biology deals with biology.” The exception is if there is a direct conflict between two people. Use the blood relative as the “expert” on that person and how to best approach the situation, and then the two people involved have the conversation directly.
  5. Religion — Who we worship, how we worship, do we go to church, how often, where, how will we handle holidays, to what degree do we raise kids with our faith — get on the same page by having the conversation, and use the tools from Episode 008 to communicate expectations.

 

So, this week, sit down with your partner and go over a few of these areas that feel either particularly “sticky” at this moment in your relationship, or that have gone unexamined altogether. Let us know what you think about this process over in the Nourish Joy Podcast Community on Facebook. Or send an email to podcast@meghandorman.com. We SERIOUSLY love to hear from you!

Meghan’s Highlight: There’s always one person in my Challenge Groups that feels like the program was just meant for them; it’s the perfect season of their life to make lifestyle changes that turn everything around for them. One Challenger posted a piece of what I wrote in their Motivation Journal and said how powerful it was to her. Just goes to show how you can affect people with words and actions that you may never know about.

Haley’s Lowlight: Even though the treats she ate at the beach this week were “Planned & Special” (see Episode 003 for that reference), she thinks she overdid it on the treats and under-did it on the hydration! Gonna go home and drink some broth.

Free Gift for you!
We’re shooting for:

  1. A bunch of Subscribers, so please click Subscribe in whatever platform you listen on (email podcast@meghandorman.com if you have trouble). This is helpful for growing the show, in terms of the type of guests and opportunities we can bring you as listeners. The more subscribers, the better the show gets! Here’s that video I created on how and why to RATE, REVIEW & SUBSCRIBE.
  2. A bunch of REVIEWS … like, 200. This is the number-one way to make sure more people find out about us, and grow this wellness-minded community. If you leave a review, screenshot it (or copy and paste) and send in an email to podcast@meghandorman.com, I will send you a FREE 30-day ebook with one new habit to focus on each day. It’s really robust but also really actionable. I know you will LOVE it.

 

Resources:

  1. Group Coaching with Meghan: If this is the month you’re ready to really take control of your health goals, I’d love to have you in one of my online Challenge groups! Click here for more info.
  2. Stay in the loop: If you’d like to get my weekly emails, with highlights from the blog, podcast, Instagram + a first look at any new resources or announcements, click here to email me and just say “ADD”!
  3. Connect with me and Haley + other listeners: If you’re not already part of the Nourish Joy Podcast Community on Facebook, come join us! We go live in the group as much as we can to answer your questions about the episodes, or whatever’s on your mind!
  4. Go behind the scenes: If you’re on Instagram, I post in my Stories daily, and would love for you to follow along and connect with me over there!

 

Have a Nourishing and Joyful weekend!

Comment

Leave a Reply

Previous Post
008 | Communicating Expectations with Your Partner
Read More
Next Post
010 | Personality Tendencies According to Myers Briggs
Read More